Cheap Beer

Following on from my belief there is nothing to do in a one-horse town like Chamonix other than ski. There actually is one single horse that sits in the middle of town. I decided to spend my evening off with, friends cooking a leg of lamb, drinking some fine wine and concluding it with a study of the cheapest beers available to Season-aires, in France.

It’s one of those tough decisions every Season-aire has to make multiple times per week. Which beer is going to get me drunk for the least amount of money, whilst still retaining taste, aesthetics, and a cool-factor? The decision is usually fairly easy in London. When I walk into my local off-license to pick up my 6 cans for a fiver, I have a choice of Heineken, Fosters, Red Stripe, Kronenbourg, Stella, and Carling. If I am lucky enough to be East Acton you can throw the Polish favourite Lekk in there as well. All the cans are 50cl. All are sitting between 4.7%, to 5.0% A.B.V. They all taste like generic, ‘made in 48 hours’ lagers, so I go for the one which makes me look cooler - Red Stripe. In Chamonix the decision is made all the harder as not all beers here taste the same. They are not the same strength, and they are most certainly never in the same size vessel. So nine beers were chosen, ranging in price from the Supermarche’s home brand Kellegen at €0.39 a 33cl can, to the pricey SuperUmarkets 75cl Biere de Garde at €1.95. Beers were judged on five factors including aesthetics, alcohol level, price, taste and a bonus three points awarded to those who had the ability get you intoxicated enough to sleep with Ellen DeGeneres. Points combined from the three judges were marked to a grand total of 69 points (How appropriate). All of the scores were arranged in a tidy little spreadsheet arranged by my computer-savvy receptionist, and fellow judge, Elliot. To the results!

In last position the pricey, tourist favourite Mont Blanc Violet beer (€1.39 per 33cl) came in with a poultry 19 out of 69. Closely followed by the horrible tequila, cachaca and guarana infused Desperados Red. To the winners and in third place the humble bottle of Kronenbourg 1664 took the honours (45/69). It impressed judges with it’s higher than average ABV (5.5%), iconic labelling, and decent enough value for money (€0.63 ea). Second place also went to the Kronenbourg brewery with its Kronenbourg Selection. (49/69) – otherwise known as ‘posh-Kronnie’ - This beer won esteem from judges for it’s aesthetics, great taste and for at least two of the judges, it’s ability to get you drunk enough to sleep with Ellen. This brings us to the winner..*drum roll please* The winner – by a single point – was Red Bavaria (50/69). Besides being applauded for it’s high A.B.V (7.9%), this beer won points from judges for it’s cracking toasted barley taste, ‘silver-bullet’ packaging, and brilliant value-for-money (€1.20 per 50cl can). A worthy winner! All the results can be seen below..

Oh yeah, by the way! We also drank a cracking bottle of 2004 Chateau Pontesac, to wash down a triple-tasty leg of Anchovy, black-olive, garlic and rosemary-studded lamb I’d prepared. Thanks to my chef at work for the recipe. Slow cooked and basted for 75 minutes and finished off with a sprinkling of Gremolata (fine parsley, lemon peel, and garlic). A side of goose-fat spuds, peas and baked aubergine made this meal one to remember.

I best get out of bed now. I need to deal with this hangover. A coffee and a trip to the Boulangerie is in order. Crusty baguette with left over Lamb, Dijon and rocket for breakfast me thinks. Viva la France..